The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality (SSSS), according to our Mission Statement, "is dedicated to advancing knowledge of sexuality. To acquire that knowledge, the Society requires freedom of inquiry...and....a forum for communication, collaboration, and critical evaluation among sexuality professionals." To this end, The Society's long-term objectives include enhancing "the human resources of The Society by recruiting members and developing the skills of the membership." Supporting our Mission Statement, The Society's Ethical Guidelines prohibit excluding or demeaning "the dignity of any person because of gender, sexual orientation, marital status, disability, ethnic origin, race, creed, age, or socioeconomic status."

Consistent with our Mission and Ethical Statements, the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality discourages sexual harassment at our annual and regional meetings. Specifically, the Board of Directors passed these motions on November 3, 1994:

• Sexual harassment is a pattern of unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature that has the effect of creating an intimidating, hostile or offensive environment at functions that are sponsored by The Society.
• The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality discourages in the strongest way any pattern of unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature that has the effect of creating an intimidating, hostile or offensive environment at functions that are sponsored by The Society.
• The Board of Directors and the Executive Director are open to, and encourage feedback about, any concerns that members have about The Society, including issues of sexual harassment.

The purpose of this brochure is to provide meaningful guidelines for both preventing sexual harassment and preserving our tradition of friendly, sex-positive meetings and open intellectual inquiry. Sexually explicit and controversial materials and discussion are legitimate in our profession. Therefore, The Society's sexual harassment policies pertain to Society participants' interpersonal behavior, not the content of their scheduled conference presentations, exhibits, or intellectual discussions at scheduled talks and workshops.

In many cases, situations that appear to be sexual harassment are the result of miscommunication. This brochure suggests ways of resolving such miscommunication, empowering Society members and newcomers to make their social and professional interactions at SSSS meetings comfortable and desirable in their own way and on their own terms. This brochure also explains The Society's strong stand against sexual harassment and provides advice on how members and others attending our meetings can call upon the Executive Director or President of SSSS to advise them on how to resolve sexual harassment complaints informally.

In opposing sexual harassment, The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality is by no means requiring those attending meetings to refrain from talking about sex or using sexual humor. Nor are we prohibiting mutually consensual touching, flirting, and sexual interactions among meeting attendees. The Society neither endorses nor prohibits particular sexual behaviors or values.

It is useful to give examples of sexual harassment before providing suggestions on prevention and resolution. What do all these possible behaviors have in common?

• Making contemptuous or hostile remarks about women (or men) in general.
• Telling a "joke" which belittles people on the basis of their sexual orientation.
• Calling an individual "an asexual prude" for disagreeing with an opinion or action.
• Saying "I really like your nipples" to a woman who is not an intimate acquaintance.
• Staring at a man's crotch during a conversation on mutual professional concerns.
• Insisting on hugging, stroking, or kissing someone who stiffened or moved away after a previous attempt at touching.
• Making a sexual advance after the recipient conveyed disinterest.

Yes, all of these examples involve either repeated, unwanted, sexual attention or sexually demeaning remarks and behavior. In other words, most or all of the behaviors listed above have a good chance of being regarded as sexual harassment by the typical person attending a SSSS meeting.

How do we avoid engaging in sexual harassment? The answer is crystal-clear: by being willing to analyze ourselves and our motives before acting and by increasing our sensitivity to others.

1. First, we should reflect upon our motives instead of acting impulsively. What are our goals or intentions? What cues, if any, do we have that the other person shares these motives? If we are attracted to someone at a SSSS meeting, how could we discuss our feelings without being blunt or impertinent?
2. Next, we should pay close attention to verbal and nonverbal communication, how others respond to us. If we get any sign that we are making someone else uncomfortable, we ought to stop our behavior immediately. Ideally, we would discuss the miscommunication openly, apologizing if and when appropriate.

Starting to flirt with someone who isn't interested is simply a misunderstanding. Continuing to make romantic advances, despite signs that our attentions are unwanted, is sexual harassment. Self-knowledge and social sensitivity prevent sexual harassment from occurring.

How do we stop sexual harassment in its tracks? We should remind ourselves that everybody is entitled to feel safe and comfortable at SSSS meetings. If we feel like someone else is sexually harassing us, we could either walk away or say that her/his comments or sexual attention are unwanted. Assertive behavior is neither aggressive nor hostile. In fact, it is best to assume that the conference participant who offended us made an honest mistake and meant no harm. Generally, the most effective response is to ask this individual to stop his/her unwanted sexual behavior in a firm but cordial and non-angry way. If this doesn't work or the problematic behavior continues despite our best efforts, we could discuss our concerns confidentially with the Executive Director or President of The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality.

Do not hesitate to contact the Executive Director or President of The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality for confidential advice on responding to situations in which you feel like you have experienced sexual harassment or have been accused, falsely or not, of engaging in sexual harassment at a SSSS meeting. Meanwhile, here are some suggestions for handling these circumstances yourself.

What should you do if you feel like you are being sexually harassed at a SSSS meeting?

1. Trust your gut. If you felt uneasy or uncomfortable, this is an important cue that something is amiss.
2. Use your feelings as permission to either leave the uncomfortable situation immediately or be assertive and provide the other person with good-natured feedback about how you would like to change your interaction. For example, you might say or later write: "X, I really wanted to talk with you, and I imagine that you meant well. However, your repeated touches and sexual comments felt inappropriate to me since we are not close friends."
3. Use an assertive voice and clear and definite body language when you are telling someone else how you would like them to change their behavior. Dissuade them from thinking you are joking by looking them in the eyes and employing a serious and business-like facial expression and tone of voice. Get to the point efficiently and non-apologetically.
4. At the SSSS meeting itself, or in telephone, face-to-face, and/or written correspondence afterwards, be willing and able to listen to the other party's experience. Remember, s/he is likely to have a different perspective on what happened than you.
5. Try to give this person the benefit of the doubt. It is helpful to treat the person who upset you as you would want to be treated. Share your concerns and negotiate how to improve future interactions with him/her personally, directly, and as soon as possible. Prevent rumors from circulating by seeking advice only from those in The Society can be trusted with confidential information.
6. If your efforts at informal resolution fail, consider the possibility of a confidential consultation with the Executive Director or President of The Society. S/he will do their best to be supportive and to make constructive suggestions.

What should you do if someone else seems to be accusing you of sexual harassment at a SSSS meeting?

1. Try to avoid being defensive when listening to the individual's complaints or reading correspondence which criticizes your behavior. Do not "shoot the messenger." Keep in mind that is is likely that this person respects you or s/he would not have had the courage to discuss anxieties about your interactions openly.
2. Consider the possibility that someone else may not have experienced your behavior in the way that you intended.
3. Find out from your accuser specifically what behavior was upsetting and what behavior s/he believes would have been better in that situation. Together, figure out ways in which the miscommunication could have been avoided in the first place, as well as a mechanism for improving future interactions; this corrective process could benefit both of you.
4. Remember, you do not have to agree with the feedback that you are receiving. Everyone is entitled to her/his own perspective on interactions. Your job is to take the other person seriously and be willing to negotiate a new, mutually comfortable and more professional way of interacting.
5. Try your best to generalize from this situation to others. Is there something you have learned here that will enhance your sensitivity in the future? Can you remember something about this individual's tone of voice, facial expression, and body language in the initial interaction that suggested s/he might be uncomfortable with what you were communicating. If so, this is something you might be on the alert for in the future.
6. If you are dissatisfied with your efforts to resolve this interpersonal conflict, feel free to discuss your concerns in confidence with the Executive Director or President of SSSS. After listening to you nonjudgmentally, it is likely that s/he will suggest constructive new directions to take.

The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality has long been an amicable, nonhierarchical, and democratic organization, open to a diversity of individuals with a scholarly interest in sexology and different values and opinions. Our sexual harassment policies are consistent with this historical tradition. By recognizing that not everyone shares our perceptions and values, we increase our chances of attracting and retaining both new and senior SSSS members.

If you have any concerns about sexual harassment, do not hesitate to contact the Executive Director at the Society office, who can work with you directly, or refer you to the SSSS President or another Board member to discuss your concerns in confidence. Our office address is: SSSS, Box 416, Allentown, PA 18105, USA. The Society telephone number is 610-530-2483; our Fax number is 610-530-2485. The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality is committed to resolving complaints of sexual harassment informally, respecting the confidentiality of all those involved.

---

This brochure, prepared by President Naomi McCormick, Ph.D., at the request of the 1994-95 Board of Directors of The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality (SSSS), was approved by the majority of SSSS Board members on June 26, 1995. Special thanks go to present and former SSSS Board and Sexual Harassment Task Force members for their helpful suggestions and editorial contributions: Pat Aletky, Ph.D., Linda Alperstein, M.S.W., Richard Friend, Ph.D., Ed Herold, Ph.D., Robert Hawkins, Ph.D., Richard Keeling, M.D., Andrew Mattison, Ph.D., Konnie McCaffree, Ph.D., Charlene Muehlenhard, Ph.D., Stephanie Sanders, Ph.D., David Weis, Ph.D., and William Yarber, H.S.D.